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01. Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones
02. At the end of every party there is always a girl crying
03. One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger
04. You're never quite sure whether it's ok to eat green crisps
05. Everyone who grew up in the 80's has entered the digits 5318008 into a calculator
06. Reading when you're drunk is horrible
07. Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly
08. You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a fire in your back garden
09. Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl
10. You never know where to look when eating a banana
11. Its impossible to describe the smell of a wet cat
12. Prodding a fire with a stick makes you feel manly
13. Rummaging in an overgrown garden will always turn up a bouncy ball
14. You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses
15. Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school
16. The most embarrassing thing you can do as schoolchild is to call your teacher mum or dad
17. The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity
18. Some days you see lots of people on crutches
19. Every bloke has at some stage while taking a pee flushed half way through and then raced against the flush
20. Old women with mobile phones look wrong
21. Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee
22. Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited
23. You never ever run out of salt
24. Old ladies can eat more than you think
25. You can't respect a man who carries a dog
26. There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've got your hand or head stuck in something
27. No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers
28. Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their arm broken by a swan
29. The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug.
30. People who don't drive slam car doors too hard
31. You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood specifically to stir paint with
32. Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose
33. Bricks are horrible to carry
34. In every plate of chips there is a bad one